I know myself well enough to recognize that it means it is time to stay, to sit with the discomfort.
I notice the urge to click over to the tab open to my email. I notice the urge to get up and see how the kids are coming with their breakfast. I notice the urge to start folding the laundry sitting next to me on the couch or organize the table covered in books, some borrowed, some our own. Even the wisps of cat hair blowing across the tile floor are calling to me.
Productivity as a form of avoidance - it gets me all the time.
I notice myself wanting to figure out the discomfort so that I can fix it. Or at least wrap it up in a neat bow for the sake of my writing. But something tells me it isn’t going to go down like that.
So I continue to stay. And I try not to think too much. The words “emerging future” keep popping into my brain. It is a term used by Otto Scharmer of the Presencing Institute in his work on systems change.
What is “emerging future” wanting me to know this morning?
And there it is - the wiggly notion rising inside of me, an awareness of what is here and what is uncomfortable.
School starts in a week. A new school, a new way of doing things, a new routine, a new language.
What is here is anticipation - and in naming it, I notice it losing some of its potency.
What is here is recognition. Oh, that. Yup, I have been anticipating transitions like a pro for more than forty years.
What is here is a slow, deep breath - letting it fill my belly and unwind some of those knots.
I am well-versed in the art of being me - which means that I know those knots are apt to tie themselves up again later in the day and again tomorrow.
Hopefully, I will remember to breath yet again.
What is your relationship to transitioning? What transitions are you anticipating as we move closer to September?
Jessica Curtis is a professional coach who helps people cultivate intention and live from a place of meaning and authenticity. If you think you could benefit from working with Jessica or want to invite her to work with your group, reach out to start a conversation. |